Stardate: July 1999
Hymn for St Simeon's Day15th JULY – With the feast day of St Simeon, our patron saint, fast approaching (21st July), now seems like a good time to unveil the Ship's hymn, written for us by that Liza Minelli among hymnwriters, Rev. Alexandra Coe. The tune, Sine Nomine, is more commonly known as "For all the Saints"...
For all you fools who surf the Internet© Alexandra Coe 1999 Holy hamper!
12th JULY – With a mere 175 days to go, 'millennium moment' merchandise seems far thinner on the ground than expected. Nevertheless, an exhaustive search of the Net produced the intriguing Hope Basket. For $30 and up you can send a friend a holy hamper, "preparing him for the future", and including...
NIV or NKJV version of the Bible or the Bible Promise Book Does the knotted scarf come in handy when your friend's computer refuses at the first fence of the 21st Century? All of which leads me to wonder what shipmates would include in their Y2K hamper. Your creative suggestions, please, direct to the Letters Page, offering no more than eight items in the hamper. Taking 'God loves a cheerful giver' too far9th JULY – A recent survey into some of the unexplored corners of church life has fallen into our hands. In one of the questions, a cross-section of English clergy were asked to name the most unsual object they had ever found in the church collection plate. Their responses...
 Cartoon by Dave Walker. Hinn unhinged5th JULY – Televangelist Benny Hinn made an appearance on British television last night, but refreshingly, he was upstaged by TV personality Ruby Wax, who spent the time at Hinn's show in Memphis chatting with people in wheelchairs, counting the cash at Hinn's bookstand, reading lurid passages out of his books and even singing enthusiastically in the choir.All of which brings to mind one of Hinn's greatest theological moments, when he declared on air that there were no less than nine members of the Holy Trinity. "God the Father, ladies and gentlemen, is a person, and he is a triune being by himself, separate from the Son and the Holy Ghost. See, God the Father is a person, God the Son is a person, God the Holy Ghost is a person, but each one of them is a triune being by himself. If I can shock you, and maybe I should, there's nine of them." Hinn later modified his view, saying: "That was a very dumb statement." Tinky Winky: fresh evidence
1st JULY – Jerry Falwell thought he was gay, but there are other theories about the identity of Tinky Winky, the purple-clad, handbag-carrying member of the Teletubbies.According to Bishop Sharon A. Brown Christopher of Illinois, Tinky Winky is a bishop: "The episcopal color is purple," she notes, "and our liturgical shirts are purple." She also points out that "the purple Teletubby has a triangle on its head – the Trinity!" However, this episcopal theory doesn't go far enough, according to Freethinkers website. The triangle on the Teletubby's head, plus the fact that like Tinky Winky, Jesus is often shown wearing a purple robe (see above), means that he is actually a new representation of Jesus. "Perhaps this is the Second Coming," the site helpfully concludes. No prominent theologian was available for comment on this vexatious doctrinal issue. Top | Old Logs | Current Log | SOF Home © Ship of Fools 1999 |