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Steve Goddard reveals how the unlikely combination of a wailing silver crucifix and a survey about vicars and violence secured a prime position on the front page of a UK national newspaper this Easter Sunday.Personal alarms are not newsworthy. Many women carry an eardrum-shattering rape alert just in case. Crucifixes are not newsworthy, either. Many ministers of religion sport a cross around their necks in the line of divine duty. Like a referee's whistle, it goes with the job.But in journalistic parlance, context is everything. With all the reports of attacks on clergy, what about adorning the ordained with a discreetly-hidden personal alarm set inside a crucifix? Now that's enough to set off a few sirens on any news desk. Witness Easter Sunday's Independent on Sunday front-page splash in London.
CATWALKPerhaps I should explain. Apart from helping to edit Ship of Fools in my spare time, I am retained as public relations consultant to the Christian Resources Exhibition in the UK. CRE is a sort of 'Ideal Church' show, where everything from videos to vestments, computers to communion wine (non-alcoholic as well as alcoholic, see Gadgets for God) are available under one roof. More than 10,000 people visit the show each year (19-22 May is the next event), one in five of whom are ordained. Over the years we have launched several new products and services on an unsuspecting, sometimes disbelieving public. For example, the ecclesiastical karaoke player; an Internet Lounge, custom-built for church members to surf while they serve; and Clergy on the Catwalk, the world's first fashion show for ministers. Vestments have been around for thousands of years, but they had never before been modelled on a catwalk by real, live clerics. Twenty-three film crews from around the world turned up for the Clergy on the Catwalk show, including CNN and ABC America. Britain's Big Breakfast TV show took four live inserts from the exhibition floor. Context, you see, is everything.
TATCHELLWhen I heard whisper of the crime-busting crucifix being produced by Avon Silversmiths, I drooled. We kept it under wraps while completing a special survey on clergy and violence which indicated that two out of three priests would consider wearing some form of discreet personal alarm. We were home and dry. The rest is becoming history. Our friends at the Independent newspaper promised a high position for an exclusive first run at the story. Front page seemed pretty fair trade. As I write, news of this unique gadget for God has been picked up by Reuters and is bouncing playfully round the world. But you always think of what might have been. Pity, for example, that we couldn't provide the crucifix to Archbishop George Carey during his Easter address in Canterbury, when the gay lobby stormed the primate's pulpit. One yank and we would have out-stunted Peter Tatchell. That would have been an event worth its weight in pure sterling silver. But then, alright, I'm being greedy Ministry of Fear | Archive | Ship of Fools Central © Ship of Fools 1998 |